Jacinta:Hello and Welcome to Two Hearts True Healing! I am Jacinta Wick and with me is Angela Stansell. This is Season 4 Episode 4…etc. We are here to begin talking about a sensitive topic that can sometimes be misunderstood and that is suffering and desolation. They are related, and St. Ignatius has some great insight into how to identify feelings and how to walk through them. The next several episodes will be walking us through desolation. Life has ups and downs and the 14 rules walk us through the spiritual side and teach us how to direct the human. In the last few episodes we have been talking through what Our Lord does to console and what the enemy does to bar and trip up and prevent. It is no different with desolation. God allows desolation but doesn’t give it. He gives encouragement and strength and uses desolation for good. He doesn’t cause it. Angela can you give us Rule Four? What is desolation?
Angela: Yes! Ignatius states, “I call desolation all the contrary of the third rule, such as darkness of soul, disturbance in it, movement to things low and earthly, the unquiet of different agitations and temptations, moving to want of confidence, without hope, without love, when one finds oneself all lazy, tepid, sad, and as if separated from his Creator and Lord. Because, as consolation is contrary to desolation, in the same way the thoughts which come from consolation are contrary to the thoughts which come from desolation.” And when he states “want of confidence” that’s a way of saying “a lack of it.”
Desolation is a form of a trial, allowed by God. It is not punishment but a lesson that ultimately makes us holier and brings us closer to God. In future episodes we will cover the different reasons for desolation, but today we will just be covering what it is. While it’s not exactly a fun topic, simply understanding it is “half the battle.” It’s like when a child turns on the lights at night and sees what shadow has been scaring him or her. “Oh. That’s all it was?”
Of course, the desolation here is specifically spiritual. It’s the opposite of consolation: opposite feelings and opposite fruits, that is, until we reject it. Desolation is an affective heaviness that makes us spiritually sad and tired, with respect to the faith and the will of God.
Non-spiritual desolation can be physical or psychological– illness, depression, etc. These non-spiritual desolations are significant. They can lead to spiritual desolation, which, when we have a choice in the matter, should be avoided.
We need to be prudent in caring for ourselves. It doesn’t mean avoiding self sacrifice at all costs, but like we’ve mentioned previously, making sacrifices after discerning whether or not they are God’s will. They might; they might not be. Rev. Jacques Philippe, author of In the School of the Holy Spirit wisely points out that God doesn’t always wish for us to do the hard thing.
This is one of the reasons why regular prayer is so important. We want to position ourselves so that we can more and more easily recognize His voice. In the lives of the saints, there are copious examples of bodily and emotional exhaustion accompanied by a joy that surpasses all understanding. As Jacinta mentioned in a previous season, we don’t do the extremes unless we are called to them. If God calls us to them, His grace will be sufficient.
There are seven forms of spiritual desolation. The first one is “darkness of soul.” This is confusion– belief that things aren’t going well and won’t improve. Fr. Gallagher describes it as “a confusion mixed with a troubled heart.”
The next form of spiritual desolation Ignatius calls “disturbance in it”. Here, the enemy wants to disrupt peace of mind and the good works that come from them. He wants to distract us from doing good, almost like a jealous bully. He hates us being anywhere near a feeling of fulfillment in doing God’s will because he wants to be worshiped.
The next form of desolation is “movement to low and earthly things.” Part of desolation can be allowing ourselves to focus on things that aren’t necessarily evil– maybe just secular or things of the natural realm. It can however be an aversion to the things of God. These can be attempts to be filled up by things that don’t truly satisfy. If you’re thinking that this sounds a bit like lukewarmness, you’re on the right track. Lukewarmness (apathy) can lead to desolation.
Another form is “disquiet from various agitations and temptations.” This is a restless feeling. A person may one day find that they try to sit down to start their usual prayer routine and they just can’t get settled. They may try a few things to improve the situation, to no avail. They don’t feel like it. There are distractions; it’s dry… As we will see in the next episode, the best thing to do is push through the routine anyway. Often, it’s a test that God is allowing, sometimes to help us lead our emotions with our intellect, or sometimes to help us quiet our intellect and embrace the gift of faith in Him more fully.
The next form of desolation Ignatius mentions in Rule 4 is “moving to lack of confidence, without hope, without love.” This is doubt. Here, Ignatius refers to the feeling of, for example, being hopeful or loving, but it’s not always the actual absence of those virtues. Virtues are not feelings, although a charitable act is perfected with the proper emotional disposition. While a person can see their sin inaccurately because of an ill-formed or clouded conscience, a person can also experience desolations that lead them to see a negatively distorted version of the virtues they currently possess. The reason this can be effective in knocking us off course towards serving God is that it can lead us to discontinue our efforts.
Next we have “finding oneself totally slothful, tepid, sad.” During these desolations, a person can be doing their usual prayer routine or usual way of serving God but feel nothing towards those things. The person becomes “jaded”. Similar to the “lack of confidence”, feeling “slothful, tepid, sad” towards God and His service does not mean that we have stopped loving God! It just means He is allowing us to experience desolation. If we respond appropriately, it will pass.
The last form of desolation is thinking and feeling “as if separated from” God. This means the person is doubting not only what is happening now, but also the past and the future. That affective feeling of separation does not mean we are actually separated from God! Satan really is the father of lies, and these are the types of things he wants us to believe so that we stop serving God– something he refused to do long ago. He insinuates that how we feel is who we are. That the situation we’re in, whatever it may be, defines us. Not so. What defines us is that God made us.
Before we move on to the thoughts that come from consolation and desolation, I have a personal example that includes some of these forms:
Many times, this happens in the middle of the night. This impending doom…thoughts that say “You’re going to hell. You think you love God but you don’t. You’re not really sorry for the things you’ve confessed. Your mind is so twisted by sin you’ll never be able to find your way out. There is no love for you, ever again, and it’s your fault.” Ahhh!! Horrible. This is not of God and needs to be promptly rejected, in the name of Jesus Christ. The St. Michael prayer. Holy water. …..Jesus loves you!! He does. These thoughts are not of God. As long as we are alive, He is inviting us to repentance and has not given up on us. He thirsts for us.
Let’s talk about the thoughts resulting from consolation and desolation. There exists a pattern when we experience consolation. First, something external brings us to focus on God. Next, we experience internally an affective change. Lastly, from that positive affective change, there will be the fruit of new thoughts. They often are thoughts that reframe our situation– thoughts of faith, hope, and charity. This is how God wants to work with our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors– in the same way that some listeners may have experienced CBT, or cognitive behavioral therapy.
Similarly, the thoughts that come from desolation are the direct result of a negative affective change and are harmful in some way. John and Stephanie Burke at Divine Intimacy Radio explain these opposites as doubt (the opposite of faith), despair (the opposite of hope), and narcissism (the opposite of charity). The combination of selfishness, negativity, and an unhealthy skepticism is not good for us neither spiritually nor in terms of mental health, so we can see how they can bounce back and forth. We really need to guard our hearts and pray for custody of mind.
Fr. Gallagher tells us “Subject to God’s grace, much will depend on whether the person is aware of, understands, and works to reject the desolation, that is to say, on whether this is a person of discernment” and that “it is when we are unaware of and do not understand the nature of spiritual desolation that we are most susceptible to its harmful deception.”…”Ignatian discernment of spirits opens the gateway to hope; it is a proclamation [as in Luke 4:18] of a liberation to those who were held in bondage.”
Jacinta: It is so freeing to name it and realize it for what it is. Let’s take a look at some scriptures now that teach us about desolation. Count it all joy, my brethren, when you meet various trials, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. – James 1:2-4
Another version says: My brothers, count it pure joy when you are involved in every sort of trial. Realize that when your faith is tested this makes for endurance. Let endurance come to its perfection so that you may be fully mature and lacking in nothing.
So beautiful. We are still called to joy even in suffering. It is considered a testing of faith that produces a steadfast and enduring character within us that lacks nothing and is perfect. This verse brings me to an important thought to define when we talk about desolation and darkness of soul. We have two kinds of desolation just like there are three types of awareness and two types of consolation. In fact, it is very good to be clear on this. Spiritual desolation and nonspiritual desolation that has its root in the body and its physical need. Let me give you an example. If we go to bed at a late hour for a few nights in succession it is only common sense to say that we would really feel it. We would be down and out and not able to function at our peaks and feel like we couldn’t go on due to lack of sleep, not because we are sensing or not sensing God. That will readily feed into spiritual desolation if not remedied by a few days of proper sleep. But the down feeling here is in the natural realm. And is caused by a poor decision that isn’t caring for a simple human need.
So what is spiritual desolation? That my friends is like our conversation on the action of God to console and strengthen and the action of the enemy to bite and prevent. Desolation is the complete opposite of Consolation and can even be put into a comparison chart. Where we experience quiet, peace, and strength in desolation we will feel agitation, restlessness, and weakness. If we are feeling these things we first have to use awareness to take a step deep inside to see if we have a physical issue that is the result of a human deficit like a recent struggle in communication, or a bad night of sleep, or maybe we are hungry. If that isn’t the case, then perhaps it’s spiritual. We can be suspicious especially if we just had a very big consolation and felt very close to God. When we aren’t feeling this, it isn’t that God removed those feelings, it is because the enemy is trying to bite us again and derail us into thinking everything was a joke. That it wasn’t real. He is trying to make us stop growing toward God.
God allows this so we learn to run to Him and grow in virtue when the feeling isn’t there. A production of enduring character, steadfastness, sincerity, and faithfulness. Showing up when we would rather not and persevering through. It is a lot easier to reject a feeling when we know where it is coming from and can clearly see the truth. When there isn’t a clear reason, it is likely that it is an invitation to faith and a call to wait again for light while still continuing in the same spiritual path. (More on this later…) This is not the case with nonspiritual desolation. If we are going on for long periods of sadness that refuse to be consoled or just feel consistently off even though we are doing everything right by the books like prayer life, nutrition, exercise, and routine then maybe there is a physical deficit or hormone problem and it needs to be addressed as such.
This takes a very close observation of roots and times. Like does it happen at a specific time in my cycle? Versus after a deep time of prayer. Or is there a pattern like after eating gluten for instance. The approach for nonspiritual desolation is to care for the need in a systematic multilayered approach. If we are experiencing these things for prolonged periods it does affect our brain function and is considered depression which is really different than just having a bad day or a time of withdrawn feelings. Desolation and depression can feed each other but they are different beasts. One being human and the other spiritual. When we are here, practicing awareness is the first step. Then a consult with the professionals like priests, counselors, spiritual directors, and a doctor. They know the right questions because it can be hard sometimes to be objective when we find ourselves clouded. Another symptom that you could be dealing with depression is a brain fog that won’t go away with proper self-care. (Of course, you are going to be feeling foggy if you aren’t getting good sleep.)
Sometimes we can be experiencing both at the same time. And it can be hard to distinguish. The main difference and a rule of thumb can be to look for the following.
- Am I looking only at myself and my image?
- Am I looking at only how others (or myself) may be viewing me?
- Am I experiencing insomnia? Or too much sleep (There can be other factors like asthma and sleep apnea which would fall under a different category.)
- Have I just had a traumatic experience that really wounded me that I am incessantly focusing on without hope?
- Do I feel numbed down? Like the lights are on in a room but you aren’t there as you normally are? Have your normal feelings of resiliency disappeared in this instance? Or do your faculties just feel less?
- Do I find myself really confused and can’t even pinpoint where these feelings are coming from or even convince myself it is a clearcut reason?
- Have I given up?
- Do I have an overall feeling of blah?
Mayo gives a clearcut list that may help drive home the point I am trying to make as follows:
- Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness or hopelessness
- Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters
- Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies or sports
- Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much
- Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort
- Reduced appetite and weight loss or increased cravings for food and weight gain
- Anxiety, agitation or restlessness
- Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements
- Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or self-blame
- Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things
- Frequent or recurrent thoughts of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide
- Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches
It also says: For many people with depression, symptoms usually are severe enough to cause noticeable problems in day-to-day activities, such as work, school, social activities or relationships with others. Some people may feel generally miserable or unhappy without really knowing why. End of quote. Some of this has some overlap, but in depression, think very magnified and very noticeable to friends and family.We are not counselors and if you are in distress reach out to the suicide hotline 9-8-8. We are not diagnosing just giving a general overview.
Those are pretty good indications that you are dealing with depression. Spiritual desolation is different. You will experience sadness, yes, and a lack of confidence, but when you are here you are not completely hopeless. Look for the following:
- Your desolation has mainly to do with how you perceive God’s relationship with you.
- You had burning fervour but now due to stress and just the ups and downs of life suddenly you don’t feel the same feelings and it takes work to stay focused but you are not completely overcome
- The focus is more that the symptoms of consolation have disappeared
- Do I realize it is a season?
- Did I just have an intense experience with Our Lord that perhaps now the feelings are absent to call out something better in or for me? (Remember God doesn’t give desolation He allows it.)
- Do I just doubt/question God’s presence vs completely disregarding Him?
One thing to note is that perhaps some of what you may be feeling is natural overtaxation or weariness and not desolation at all. But it can soon turn into that if not properly cared for. If you have been especially busy or outpouring yourself for others you also need to take care of yourself. Depression is beyond the scope of spiritual direction and this episode but helpful to know if it exists. Spiritual direction is to mainly find God and where He is with the bumps you experience. Psychological trauma and the natural human aspect of working through it can be supplemented by a spiritual director but perhaps if you’ve been in the throws for a long time a counseling session and cognitive behavioral therapy or EMDR is a better option especially if you are stuck. Being on medication is a good thing when it is really needed. It does clear your brain and help you reach a more normal place. A both and approach is very good and healthy. We need to be careful that we are not labeling something either desolation or depression when it could be neither. It can be so hard to designate and can even be more confusing by a combination of factors.
So what does one do when you do start to feel down or disturbed? (Later episodes we will talk about this in depth but I want to leave you with a slight game plan so if you are here you can begin doing something.) What happens in Genesis 41:55-57? There is famine in the land and Joseph is able to feed the Egyptians because he has stored up from times of plenty. That means we have to go into our storehouses and look where God has acted in the past and how. How has he given you consolation? Just look here and stay here because it will stir your faith and give you food to hope. Be patient. God will come again. Stay praying and conversing with your Creator. Prayer always helps and God hears and sees your pain and will not leave you. He will strengthen you.
The second passage where I want to bring you is from the gospel of John 8:1-11. A woman is caught in adultery and the Pharisees and the people are trying to get a response from Jesus and what does he do? He bends down and writes in the earth. The people keep pressing Him but he ignores them. Then He straightens and says, “Let him who has committed no sin cast the first stone.” What does this teach us? This is something that isn’t the traditional take away. To take a pause. Seriously. Focus on something else for a period. Whether that is reading a good book or studying something or doing a hobby or taking a walk or just sitting in a silent place for a bit or a hot shower. Then come back. It gives our brain a minute to just re-group and put aside intense emotions to a clearer frame of mind so we can see better.
What is another insightful thing from this passage that is helpful to note? The people leave and Jesus is left with the woman alone. Again not the traditional nor exhaustive meaning. Eventually all these trappings of feelings will leave. Jesus says to us as He said to the woman, “Woman where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And he said to her, “Neither do I condemn you; go and do not sin again.” This shows us it is our free will to accept or reject these feelings for what they are. C.S. Lewis says in The Case for Christianity, “Why, then did God give them free will? Because free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having. A world of automata- of creatures that worked like machines- would hardly be worth creating.”
In closing, Romans 8:28 says We know that in everything God works for good with those who love him, who are called according to his purpose. Know that we hold you in prayer! If you have a specific prayer intention or want something specific for healing, we are pleased to announce you can now email us at prayer@twoheartstruehealing.com and we will cover you in prayer. Or maybe you have received a miracle. We would love to rejoice with you. Or if you just want to contact us in general, reach out to us on Facebook or Substack or email us at twoheartstruehealing@outlook.com . We would love feedback on how this or other episodes are touching you. You can also reach us on our webpage www.twoheartstruehealing.com or on our youtube channel. Thank you so much for listening and until next time, go with God!
Resources:
- Fr. Timothy Gallagher “The Discernment of Spirits: An Ignatian Guide for Everyday Living”
- https://share.google/xAgkLPx2kMy1refuY (an article on desolation vs depression)
- How to Trust God When It’s Hard
- https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=buZ6xyeOugk&si=uo9VXI4id49mRzeA
- John and Stephanie Burke at Divine Intimacy Radio
- C.S. Lewis “The Case for Christianity”
- https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/symptoms-causes/syc-20356007
- Rev. Jacques Philippe, In the School of the Holy Spirit