Jacinta: Hello and welcome to Two Hearts True healing! I am your host Jacinta Wick and with me is cohost Angela Stansell. Welcome back to The Battleground of the Mind and the 14 Rules of St. Ignatius. We had a nice little Christmas Break and I hope you did too and that you enjoyed our special editions. Just for a little recap to refresh our memories of where we are, we are talking about desolation. Rule 5 covers when to resist making a change when in desolation. Rule 6 covers when to embrace change in desolation and today we talk about thoughts to choose. Take it away Angela!
Angela:The seventh rule is as follows:
“Let the one who is in desolation consider how the Lord has left him in trial in his natural powers, so that he may resist the various agitations and temptations of the enemy; since he can resist with the Divine help, which always remains with him, though he does not clearly feel it; for the Lord has taken away from him his great fervor, abundant love, and intense grace, leaving him, however, sufficient grace for eternal salvation.”
In spiritual desolation, it’s important to think about how God has allowed us to struggle, for a purpose, and that His help is there, even though the consolation has ended. We can think of the Ascension when Jesus says “It is better for you that I go,” right, because the Holy Spirit, the Helper, can then come and continue leading us through to salvation. It’s bittersweet but necessary to our spiritual growth.
So we really need to think of this as a trial, not some punishment from a detached and unfeeling God or as senseless, chaotic happenings in a universe that simply revolves around the survival of the fittest. Especially when it’s Satan tempting us and not simply our human frailty or the poor choices of others, it’s more like a vaccine. The enemy, in a limited and weakened way, is allowed by God to give us a hard time, but only as far as God allows. He is a Father who loves us. If that’s especially difficult for you to wrap your brain around, or if it hasn’t been able to take that long journey from head to heart, take a look at Season 1 of Two Hearts True Healing, which helps heal earthly father wounds so that you can accept the love of your heavenly Father more fully.
I like how Fr. Gallagher put it in his Discernment of Spirits book. He says on p. 95 that without the awareness and acknowledgement of what God is doing for us in spiritual desolation, a person “can only be guided by [his/her] spontaneous response to such desolation; the desolation appears to have no meaning or value and appears to be simply an unhappy burden that leaves [him or her] disheartened and confused.” This can cause an unhelpful bitterness. It was Venerable Fulton Sheen who said, “Pain without Christ is suffering; pain with Christ is sacrifice.”
When we struggle with this sense of purpose, it doesn’t instantly become “sunshine and rainbows,” but some of the heaviness can lift. We receive the gift of hope and are strengthened. Jesus tells us His yoke is easy and His burden light. This is the fruit of humility. St. Paul gives us the metaphor of “running the race.” We’re not running for the sake of running. Maybe sometimes it’s true that we’re allowed to be chased, but mostly we are running to our Beloved. This is a time to grow in trust. From Discernment of Spirits p. 96: “That increased trust will be a light.” Over time, we can learn to stop focusing on the pain, which can become selfish. And that doesn’t mean God doesn’t care. In fact he cares very much and wants to train you for something better. What he wants for you is spiritual stability.
Let’s talk about the nature of this trial. On page 98 of Discernment of Spirits, Fr. Gallagher gives a vignette. He says of a woman in spiritual desolation: “She is aware that her conviction and her will are operative, but she feels no sense of God working in her.” So we need to accept by faith that we are not left to our own devices. If that actually happened, not only would we lose all of our abilities, but we would cease to exist altogether. Truly, the very air in our lungs is a reminder, whether we feel helped or not, that God is offering His help and His hope.
One more thing before we move on to the purpose of the trial. Remember that spiritual desolation can be in relation to multiple spiritual things. Fr. Gallagher sums it up nicely on p. 98. He says these can be desolation regarding “community worship, service to others, daily efforts to love the Lord when we are in spiritual desolation.”
Let’s delve into the purpose of the trial for a bit. Over time, a person learns how to recognize and respond to spiritual desolation, and it becomes less of an occasion for harm. These times begin to bear fruit sooner than they once did. When it comes to resisting spiritual desolation, we learn by doing, and the more times God takes us through this, we can consolidate this learning, have it sort of “congeal”, and then take those parts and use them fluently as a whole. For those athletes listening, with God’s help, it can become sort of a “I eat desolation for breakfast.” Not to say we should be cocky, but just that it can become something that we expect and aren’t frightened by.
A couple quotes from Fr. Gallagher. On page 99 and 100 he tells us, “Repeated experience of and repeated resistance to the trial of spiritual desolation is the normal path, in God’s design for the human person, toward freedom from subjugation to such desolation. When humbly and courageously resisted, spiritual desolation becomes, indeed, a crucial spiritual lesson, teaching hope and guiding the person toward spiritual maturity in ways that spiritual consolation alone could not accomplish.” Later on the same page he says of both spiritual consolation and desolation, “Each movement permits its own kind of growth. Both are necessary… through both, we come to ‘the full stature of Christ.’” And that’s referencing scripture– Ephesians 4:13.
The last two sections Fr. Gallagher has on Rule 7 he calls “When ‘You Can’t’ becomes ‘I Can’” and “‘Remembering’ and ‘Forgetting.’” We may feel as though we can’t resist, but God says that, with His help, it’s simply not true! “You can’t,” spiritually, comes from the Enemy. Again, this does not pertain to non-spiritual desolation. Our physical and emotional resources are finite and need to be replenished.
Fr. Gallagher writes on p. 102, “The transition from a faltering ‘I can’t’ to a courageous ‘I can,’ with God’s sustaining help, creates the freedom for persevering resistance and breaks the power of spiritual desolation.” The enemy uses distraction and lies to push us to forget what God has done for us because he knows that if we remember, we can begin to resist. This is why it’s important to fill ourselves with frequent prayer and surround ourselves with sacred scripture, sacred art, Christian fellowship, and the like.
Jacinta: As Angela said, it is most important when we are in desolation to stay centered and grounded in prayer, sacred scripture, sacred art, and community. When it is non-spiritual desolation or dryness it is still important to have these things as God did not create us to be alone. He established an order to this world, not an empty waste of chaos and darkness but an intentional creativity. (See Isaiah 45:15-25). His truth gives strength to the most timid and forlorn soul. By His existing He is not just a distant hand but Someone actively participating in your life and moving you and accompanying you and knowing you and most importantly loving you. Like a loving parent who allows freedom to the children to explore and try out his/her wings for initiative, creativity, interdependence, and decisions and sometimes fail and sometimes be successful. How can we learn unless we succeed and at other times fall? It’s like learning to walk or taking a daily jog for exercise purposes.
If we take the jogging example, the most successful joggers are the ones who take a slow determined gait and not a sprint and slowly build the stamina to go farther and farther. Sprints cannot be sustained and are meant for short distances or we find ourselves tired out and physically depleted. It is like a 5k marathon runner. A slow and steady progress that in the end game gets you farther stronger. Same with lifting weights or any exercise for that matter. We act from the knowledge and strength we have already gained and respond to the command of the Lord when and how He says. Not a moment before or a moment after but with. Does this mean it is easy? No. At times it can be quite hard, but when we realize we are not alone then we can begin to see with purpose and clarity. It becomes doable. Knowledge is the first step of any wisdom. It cannot be a distant theory but a lived experience. We cannot give or receive depleted of our resources. What do I mean? I refer again to the difference of spiritual versus non-spiritual and dryness versus desolation. A good tradesman has dirt and grease and grime on his hands. He knows what he is doing because he lives and works in the field and in varying circumstances. Seasoned is the word I’m looking for. Or a sourdough baker who gradually learns through trial and error and the right tools and environments how to make a rich tasty loaf. Both do have science, but it is also a learned art not just by book and recipe but heart. It does involve skill, but it also requires the right environment and thought and feel and intuition and decision. This can only happen by receiving and acting on this receiving.
Grace is similar to these examples. It is always there but has to be carefully maintained and sustained. We can lose it just like a skill if we don’t keep at it and carefully guard and protect what we have. Bread doesn’t work under certain conditions. So a ready made heart that is open to change and pliable is most successful. There is sin in this world and imperfection, and we grow by learning to accept and live with what we have. That does not mean a passive, indifferent acceptance but an informed active participation. Yes, things beyond our control happen. Yes, wounding can occur both intentionally and unintentionally. Yes, we can act outside of grace, but God is constantly present, waiting for us to catch up with him. Remember the footsteps in the sand? At the most difficult moments, He carries us; other times we walk with Him yoked like oxen, and the burden comes lighter because He is carrying most of the load. He wants our assistance and wants to assist us. When we go against the grain is when we have difficulty. Also it is a law of physics to have resistance. (Think the enemy not just the evil one but the broader scope of the negative aspects of our hearts and other’s hearts and yes Satan too.) Let’s take a peek at an Old Testament passage:
“Take courage, my people, O memorial of Israel! It was not for destruction that you were sold to the nations, but you were handed over to your enemies because you angered God. For you provoked him who made you, by sacrificing to demons and not to God. You forgot the everlasting God, who brought you up, and you grieved Jerusalem, who reared you. For she saw the wrath that came upon you from God, and she said: ‘Listen, you neighbors of Zion, God has brought great sorrow upon me; for I have seen the captivity of my sons and daughters, which the Everlasting brought upon them. With joy I nurtured them, but I sent them away with weeping and sorrow. Let no one rejoice over me, a widow and bereaved of many; I was left desolate because of the sins of my children, because they turned away from the law of God. “Take courage, my children, and cry to God, for you will be remembered by him who brought this upon you. For just as you planned to go astray from God, return with tenfold zeal to seek him. For he who brought these calamities upon you will bring you everlasting joy with your salvation.” – Baruch 4:5-12, 27-29
Hmm. Desolation can happen because of decisions we make (sin or imperfection sprinting when slow and steady would have been better) but it is not always based on something we are doing wrong. We could be doing everything right and still run into resistance. Again please keep in mind the physical versus the spiritual and dryness versus desolation. This leads me to another thought and that is scrupulosity. St. Ignatius calls for a consideration in this rule, but there is such a thing as over considering. We could read this passage and go… “It’s all me. I’m so bad. God can’t possibly forgive me.” Or “He is going to punish me for every little thing.” Where does love come from? Where does fear come from? (1 John 4:18). Scrupulosity is a hard thing to deal with because it gives us no rest and builds agitation, which is not from God. It puts us beyond His protection and into human initiative versus surrender. It is basically saying, “I am beyond God’s grace and mercy,” and that makes our heart not able to receive His gifts or others’ love. But it is kinda hard to see the heart in just those verses. Suffering hurts. How can it be joyful? How can calamities be happening and God is promising to bring everlasting joy with salvation? Let’s read a few more verses and see the piece that makes this whole part alive and brings the compassion piece that a struggling soul might be missing in the struggle of acceptance. It’s not always about picking yourself up by the bootstraps and being selfmade and self-reliant. Completely the opposite. It is about resilience and hope. If I fall I can get up. If I am hurt or struggling, I can trust and I can heal. “But how?” you may be asking.
“They led away the widow’s beloved sons, and bereaved the lonely woman of her daughters. “But I, how can I help you? For he who brought these calamities upon you will deliver you from the hand of your enemies. Go, my children, go; for I have been left desolate. I have taken off the robe of peace and put on the sackcloth of my supplication; I will cry to the Everlasting all my days. “Take courage, my children, cry to God, and he will deliver you from the power and hand of the enemy. For I have put my hope in the Everlasting to save you, and joy has come to me from the Holy One, because of the mercy which soon will come to you from your everlasting Savior.* For I sent you out with sorrow and weeping, but God will give you back to me with joy and gladness for ever.” – Baruch 4:16-23
We are not alone. See? “How can I help you?” He takes on all the suffering and redeems us. He pays the price. We need to delve a little deeper into love to further answer this question. Love is Trinitarian. We see seeds for the next passage which is from the New Testament. Matthew 16:13-17 Allow me to share a special image I received from praying with this passage. It is when Peter declares Christ and receives the keys of the kingdom. “It is not flesh and blood that have revealed this to you but my Father in Heaven.”
The Father reveals the Son who shows the Holy Spirit. It’s not just pointing but an embrace. The love of the Father carries the Son and the Son opens His arms and the Holy Spirit bursts forth as the radiant light love and energy that enlightens and strengthens between and from them. An embrace we are strongly locked in. It surrounds us. Those open arms take us right in and the illumination is given to us. We allow this light to flow freely or we hinder it around us. We have to let Jesus show us the Holy Spirit. Remember the Divine Mercy Image? We can hide in the wounds of Christ and in this embrace He is offering us or we can turn our back and close ourselves off. How? Putting an unhealthy barrier or through laziness or telling ourselves a lie versus the truth instead of the correct posture of opening our hands in return and receiving the love so we also can give it. It pierces our very heart and suddenly we are mirroring Jesus. Wounds and all are transformed to Love…
Does that mean I am a complete open book? To God, Yes. But to others it depends. What is the context? Do they have a right to know? Would it help or hinder? How does it benefit the relationship? (Spouse versus friend versus acquaintance versus stranger.) Laying boundaries where needed is a necessity.
Sometimes it is the healthy thing not to say anything about those really deep places where God dwells. Sometimes we hold our hands over our heart so we can better commune with our creator and save the light for Him. Some of this embrace is meant only for us. We open hands only when God invites us to show others.Veiling is necessary when it invites greater beauty and mystery and honor and protection. It is about the posture of the heart. Think of the hemoral veil with the chalice and the veil within the taburnacle in front of the sacred species. They have times and places of being seen and only for certain people to see and receive with only certain hands and eyes and tongues to experience/touch/give this gift and there has to be a willingness and an entering with permission and training and belief and blessing. The Greatest Gift is locked with a key. We all know about keys and access. And secret gardens if you want to get more metaphorical. These places are not just for anyone. Everyone is welcome but are the arms open to receive fully? Depends. God sees. God knows. God shows. God tells. He gave the keys to Peter and this Albeit (steward) hands on the authority to those who will receive it. There are absolutes and guidelines and spoken and unspoken customs that are passed on with the guidance of the HOLY SPIRIT. It is not a free for all. God has His order and we can live in harmony to it or create chaos within and around us.
I want to end with a quote from a saint. “Do not grieve over the temptations you suffer. When the Lord intends to bestow a particular virtue on us, He often permits us first to be tempted by the opposite vice. Therefore, look upon every temptation as an invitation to grow in a particular virtue and a promise by God that you will be successful, if only you stand fast.”–Saint Philip Neri
Resources:
- Fr. Timothy Gallagher, “Discernment of Spirits, An Ignatian Guide for Everyday Living.”
- Baruch 4:5-12, 16-23, 27-29,
- Matthew 16:13-17
- St. Philip Neri “Do not grieve over the temptations you suffer. When the Lord intends to bestow a particular virtue on us, He often permits us first to be tempted by the opposite vice. Therefore, look upon every temptation as an invitation to grow in a particular virtue and a promise by God that you will be successful, if only you stand fast.”