Jacinta: Hello and Welcome to Two Hearts True Healing. I am your host Jacinta Wick and with me is co-host Angela Stansell! We are in Season Four Episode 9. The Battleground of the Mind ect…Goodness! Where does the season go? We have been talking about a lot of things. Like when to know if you are in depression or desolation or dryness or a combination of all three. We have talked about the mindset and approach to encountering these things, and today we are going to talk about reasons; causes if you will to why God allows us to begin experiencing these things. Angela, can you read the rule for us?
Angela: Absolutely. Here’s the ninth rule: “There are three principal reasons why we find ourselves desolate. The first is, because of our being tepid, slothful, or negligent in our spiritual exercises, and so through our faults spiritual consolation withdraws from us. The second, to try us and see how much we are and how much we extend ourselves in His service and praise without so much payment of consolations and increased graces. The third, to give us true recognition and understanding so that we may interiorly feel that it is not ours to attain or maintain increased devotion, intense love, tears or any other spiritual consolation, but that all is the gift and grace of God our Lord, and so we may not build a nest in something belonging to another, raising our mind in some pride or vainglory, attributing to ourselves the devotion or the other parts of the spiritual consolation.”
Similar to the Ascension, where Jesus says to the Apostles “It is better for you that I go,” God allows this feeling of separation to come upon us because He wants to do something good for us. By “cause”, Ignatius means God’s motive for allowing desolation. It’s always for our good and our growth, but that growth isn’t caused by the desolation itself, rather, our choice to resist it. If we don’t resist it, it will harm us, and if we do resist it, we will grow. In Rule 9, Ignatius gives three motives, but he also acknowledges that God may have other reasons as well. These are the three principle motives, and therefore they’re worth spending some time on. The implication here is that we use Rule 9 to help us with Rule 6: Once we recognize that we’re in a state of spiritual desolation, we also need to examine the cause of it. More on that in a bit.
So the first reason God may allow spiritual desolation is to help us see that we’ve walked away from Him. In the beginning of this season, we established that these Rules for Discernment pertain to those who are trying to serve the Lord, not those who are going from mortal sin to mortal sin. There is a similarity, though. When going from mortal sin to mortal sin, a person’s conscience pricks and stings to motivate the person to repent. We feel guilty. When a person is simply growing in the service of the Lord and has started to go off course in a more minor way, God can allow the spiritual discomfort of desolation. Here, there is a specific part of the spiritual life that needs attention. It’s meant to be a “wake-up call”. It’s similar to physical discomfort. If a person were unable to feel pain, they might not realize they may need to do something to stop their body from being harmed.
In Discernment of Spirits by Fr. Timothy Gallagher, p. 119, writes: “When, like Ignatius, dedicated people discover the God who loves them more than they love themselves and understand the withdrawal of spiritual consolation and the experience of spiritual desolation in the light of this healing love, then they have understood the first cause for which God permits spiritual desolation. Aided by such understanding they will find strength, like Ignatius, to make the changes that God will bring them once more close to God.”
The second reason is not because of our own sin. If we truly love God, we would make loving choices regardless of how we feel. In other words, if we only want to serve God when we’re receiving His consolation, that could mean we’re “in love with” the consolation and not Him. He wants to give us consolation, but His love is not transactional. Especially for those of us who are confirmed soldiers of Christ– He wants loyal patriots, not flaky mercenaries. That love is to be earned is a lie from the Evil One. In the Garden of Eden, Satan wanted Adam and Eve to seek to “earn” what God was already freely offering them. So sometimes God knows we need the opportunity to love Him in a more ordered way, and He may do this by allowing spiritual desolation. In this situation, one could say He’s not so much after our deliberate sin but rather our human weaknesses. This loyalty without the reward of consolation is a sort of trust fall, if you will. Ultimately, we can never outdo the generosity of God, and we hope someday to hear the words “Well done, my good and faithful servant.”
On p. 120, Fr. Gallagher gives an anecdote of a person experiencing both consolation and desolation during a retreat. After a time of desolation, the person sees the fruit of their resistance and says, “I realize now more than ever how much God loves me, how much I need him; and I am more determined than ever to ‘keep my eyes fixed on Jesus,’ to follow Him, to serve Him, to do His will.’’ This is what can happen when we resist.
Here’s another example of the fruit of desolation, from p. 121: “I realize through this desolating experience how powerless I am over my compulsive tendency to work so hard and my great need for God’s strength in this area of weakness. God’s constant love for me is enabling me to see in a deep way how lovable I am. It is helping me to appreciate my own giftedness in working with the homeless.” So the person has been confirmed in her specific call to serve, humbled at seeing her fault, yet lifted up by God’s love.
Something I think that’s important to mention is that God doesn’t show us all of our faults at once. It would be like seeing His face. It’s too much, and we couldn’t handle it; it wouldn’t be constructive. A good teacher gives a student appropriate challenges. One definition of mercy is that the person is being given what is needed for them to mature. Maybe sometimes it’s more information (instruct the ignorant), or another chance (bear wrongs patiently), or, if appropriate, a given consequence (admonish the sinner). Maybe they just need encouragement (counsel the doubtful), etc. So God’s allowance of desolation is one thing He uses to teach His children new things, and this is a form of mercy. We are fallen, weak, foolish, sinful, and limited. We need a Good Shepherd.
On p. 122 we have a great quote from St. Francis of Assisi. He once said to a brother who was in the throes of strong temptation: “No one must consider himself a servant of God until he has undergone temptations and tribulations. Temptation overcome is in a way a ring with which the Lord espouses the soul of his servant to himself.”
The third reason. This is where God is helping us realize, or realize more deeply, that, in the words of Fr. Gallagher, we are not “spiritually sufficient unto ourselves.” I think for those accustomed to buying into our culture, that can be a really foreign concept. What’s our free will for, right? But it’s true. God tells us “apart from Me you can do nothing.” I can imagine that passage triggering a lot of things for someone who has experienced abuse in a relationship. Receiving implicit and direct messages that one is helplessly under the power of another. To have experienced that, either romantically or from an authority figure, and then to try to open up to God, who actually is omnipotent, can be confusing and uncomfortable. One thing that can help untangle that a bit is to know that God came first and, as I said, actually is powerful. A person who behaves abusively is usually trying to gain power through means that trespass on the free will of others, whether they’re aware of it or not. God, who is Perfect Love, respects our free will– enough to allow our salvation to take thousands of years, and counting. So the problem is not that God is somehow like that controlling person you may have in your life, it’s that the controlling person tries to take what should only be given to God, whose love is perfect. Our worship, and that level of obedience and trust, is only safe, 100% safe, when we give it to the One who made us. All other love that we encounter will have some degree of fallenness in it.
So God’s love, His consolation, His grace, are not things we earn, and He knows how much we all have the tendency to try and earn them. We’re sheep, and we wander foolishly and pridefully. Once we can resist the desolation that God wants to use to help us appreciate consolation as a gift, we are then open to receiving the gift of greater humility. Humility is the gateway to other virtues: At this point, we can allow ourselves to become clay in the Potter’s hands; we allow ourselves to be shaped more and more by His loving Hands. We magnify Him, glorify Him, and lead others to Him so as to aid in filling Heaven!
So what do we do with all of this in Rule 9. Ignatius is implying, by giving three main causes, that we need to find the cause in order to resist the desolation, just like we would do with a physical ailment. It’s common to assume, without proper examination, that the desolation is due to our faults. Do the best examination of conscience you can, with the love you have for God in your heart, not a disordered fear of sin or love of perceived perfection. If there’s really nothing glaringly obvious, it’s very comforting to move on from that and rest in the idea that God has something He is preparing you for. You don’t have to understand every single piece; God’s ways are not our ways. But simply cooperate and “trust the process.” God is excited to help you grow and mature, in all patience and wisdom. He is the Perfect Parent.
Jacinta: I want to reiterate that the first step in feeling any down feelings is awareness. Do we have something going on in the spiritual realm or the physical realm? Sometimes it is hard to know because there isn’t always a clear answer. That is where this rule comes in. We have to be detectives and approach ourselves with curiosity and gentleness. Whatever the outcome, we need to rest assured that God is with us and loving us and will direct us when we turn to Him and do our part. He is not (and has not) left us and isn’t going to start leaving us. This rule gives us freedom because there is only one time when it is our fault. When we are truly being lazy, tepid, or negligent. The rest, well…it raises a good question, why?
God doesn’t want us attached to the gifts but to Himself. He doesn’t want us being self-reliant but interdependent; in other words trustworthy and dependant on Him and willing to work with Him and others and ourselves. He wants humility. Which is a deeply misunderstood word. Humility is admittance of the truth. Truth needs to be discovered and is a constant. Oftentimes we like to have our ducks in a row but God doesn’t always work in that fashion. He puts a duck here and a duck there. He writes straight with crooked lines. Which brings us to the next point. He allows desolation because He wants to know (and us too) if we are keeping our eyes on Him and serving Him truly. When desolation comes, we have to ask ourselves, “Did I do something?” If the answer is yes, we take steps to correct that by prayer first (as talked about in the former rules) making an act of contrition or going to confession or spiritual direction or Mass or a bit of all the above and take slow calculated steps to do our part to mend what we can. Like if we just had a conflict with our spouse or children, revisiting that to see our part in it and repairing it. Communication is SOOOO important. Consolation usually follows suit.
If the answer is no, then you need to realize that there is a purpose. Perhaps you are doing everything right. Then keep doing it. Build those spiritual muscles. Have an attitude of openness and seeking. Tell yourself the truth as you know it and don’t be afraid to ask for help and insight to make sure you are correct. God wants to see our faithfulness. He wants to see our love of Him, Others, and Ourselves…JOY (Jesus Others You). Are you stuck? Then perhaps God has more for you…Perhaps there is a little conversion that needs to happen in yourself or in another individual. We can only tend to ourselves. God uses both our strengths and our weaknesses for growth. Maybe you need a deeper awareness of something or further obedience. But don’t panic. Don’t feed agitation as that comes from the enemy. Consolation and even Desolation isn’t really ours. It’s a lesson perhaps that God wants to show us to help us depend more on Him first. God has a plan and we will only be happy if we are following it. When you are ready, God will let you know the next piece of the puzzle. It is the trusting piece that is really hard sometimes. Scripture is full of examples of when individuals turn from God to themselves or riches, Like Moses striking the rock when he was supposed to speak or Aaron and Miriam when they were supposed to guide the people and instead put themselves ahead of Moses when they were supposed to assist him as the leader and they were supposed to do their roles and not compare. Even Jonah and the great storm and the whale because he was running from the presence of the Lord. Or when Jonah was in the desert after Nineveh and attached to the plant versus the people. Even King David and King Saul…the list goes on. There are also many good examples of people who have done the right thing and God rewards them. Lives of the Saints is another good place to go for examples.
We want to learn from them and not repeat the same mistakes. Of course we are going to fail but we must do our best. That is all God is asking for. I want to bring you to a wonderful resource if you are looking for something. That is Magnify 90 for women, Exodus 90, (Some places it might be called Niniveh 90) for the guys, and Cana 90 for spouses. This is a daily journey in study and spiritual practices and prayer with scripture, the Catechism, and lives of the Saints. When we run to God first then it is amazing what God can do. It is the daily exercise and trial and error that brings growth.
God makes a promise to us! Open to Psalm 81.
“I relieved your shoulder of the burden; your hands were freed from the basket. In distress you called, and I delivered you; I answered you in the secret place of thunder; I tested you at the waters of Meribah. Hear, O my people, while I admonish you! O Israel, if you would but listen to me! There shall be no strange god among you; you shall not bow down to a foreign god. I am the Lord your God, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt. Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it. “But my people did not listen to my voice; Israel would have none of me. So I gave them over to their stubborn hearts, to follow their own counsels. O that my people would listen to me, that Israel would walk in my ways! I would soon subdue their enemies, and turn my hand against their foes. Those who hate the Lord would cringe toward him, and their fate would last for ever. I would feed you with the finest of the wheat, and with honey from the rock I would satisfy you.” – Psalms 81:6-16
The other scripture I want to bring you to today is a simple one from Luke. Let it carry you especially if you are struggling. Read the entire first chapter to see Zechariah first and then Mary in the Annunciation. There are so many amazing comparisons but I want to bring you to verse 35. “And the Angel said to her, ‘The Holy Spirit will come upon you and the power of the Most High will overshadow you…’” This verse has brought me a lot of consolation through the years. You have God dwelling with you and overshadowing you. The Holy Spirit will not leave you and constantly works upon, in, and through you. God will not let you go. The whole Trinity embraces you! Be at peace and walk with us as you are not in the journey alone!
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