Hello and Welcome to Two Hearts True Healing! I am your host Jacinta Wick and we are in Season Two. Episode 3 Lifted Up. I have to say I love a good Italian meal. The pasta, tomatoes, basil, even anchovies, and cheese or even a good basil pesto and parmesan and garlic. Something about the rich flavor is satisfying to the very core. It is soul-food. I am not just talking about ordinary spaghetti with red sauce but the authentic mixtures of noodles and sauces and cheeses. My dad would say “The only thing Italian in me is my stomach.” I would have to say I agree and I would say the same thing.

Why am I talking about pasta in a mental health podcast? Is food even to be mentioned with that topic? Yes by all means!!!  You might be thinking, I suppose since it follows self-care. But that is not why. I was thinking about another parallel that comes with spaghetti. The difference between male and female brains. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Men have waffles and women have spaghetti for brains.” Meaning men think in a very black and white way in one little box and they can only focus on that one thing. Women, on the other hand, can think and do multiple things at once. They are masters at multitasking and being a little scatter-brained. Getting a little scientific, let me explain.

If you were to look at the synapsis of a male brain you would see that the connections between the two sides of the brain are almost nothing with the receptors being very slow. I am not saying there are no connections but that in the realm of thought they literally can be thinking about nothing. Women on the other hand are always thinking and feeling about something at a very rapid pace and new connections are always being made with new information. That is not a problem, it is just different. That is why when a young man is learning something, it is necessary to have them do some sort of physical activity to wake up their brain and get the receptors working, then connections can start to be made and what they are learning can sink in. Males and females are different right down to the wiring. Not better than the other. Equal but different. This is a very good God-given gift that is very complimentary in nature and why we fit so well together. The roles are different and we help each other. Opposites attract.  It is not a competition but a relay race that involves team-work.

This is at the very core of what we are talking about; fatherhood and belonging and authority. We’ll look at how men and women relate and how God calls each one. In this episode, I would like to examine with you the role of a man and his authority and how he really is the one to shape belonging and set the tone for love and acceptance. He truly is the initiator and the one who gives and fills up one’s heart. Just like God gives and we receive and then can give to others. We give out of fullness. Men are to fill up our love tanks. Let’s begin this examination with an Old Testament passage and see what we can glean from it. Turn to Numbers 21:4b-9.

And the people became impatient on the way. And the people spoke against God and against Moses. “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? For there is no food and no water, and we loath this worthless food.” The Lord sent fiery serpents among the people…

 Looking closely, what do we see about a father relationship? Trust is necessary. Trust in provision. A man must provide. Provision can take many forms both physically and spiritually. What did the children of Israel do in regards to this provision? Complain. They were not content to know that God would provide for them nor were they filled with gratitude. They chose to look at the worst possible outcome. They showed a lack of respect in God’s chosen vessel, Moses. That action brought down upon them fiery serpents that bit the people so that many of them died. It took a consequence to open their eyes. This brings us to the second bit that we see is necessary in a father relationship.

And the people came to Moses, and said, “We have sinned, for we have spoken against the Lord and against you; pray to the Lord that he take away the serpents from us.” So Moses prayed for the people.

What was the action of Moses with their repentance? He was an intercessor and mediator before God on their behalf. First and foremost is this role. A man must learn to take the needs of his family before the Lord on their behalf. He must bring their repentance, and sorrow for sin. He must bring their requests. He must bring to God their desire for holiness, wholeness, and healing. In a word, he must take everything to God, first. We can see what God does with this prayer.

And the Lord said to Moses, “Make a fiery serpent, and set it up as a sign; and every one who is bitten, when he sees it, shall live.” So Moses made a bronze serpent and set it up as a sign; and if a serpent bit any man, he would look at the bronze serpent and live.

Hmmm. This is a very interesting solution to their request for healing especially since God forbid in the old covenant any image being made of any creature so they would not be led astray to worship the false gods of the people of the land and from Egypt they knew. The answer to this question takes some careful observation. Isn’t it interesting that God uses a snake? It is in direct contrast. Where do we find snakes in scripture? The Genesis story. Here the snake is not a hero. He is the enemy. He brings condemnation and trickery and deceit. So why would God use a snake for healing? Doesn’t it seem like a bit of a contradiction? Yes, so it may seem but, it is a type of a greater mystery that will happen to prepare God’s people for the Messiah. What happened in the Genesis story?

I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her seed; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel. (Genesis 3:15)

This is the verse that talks about the cursing of the serpent, the Evil One in the Garden of Eden. So it is a contradictory sign. Who is the he? What is the enmity? The answer to this is in our new testament passage and it talks of God taking on the Cosmic Battle between Good and Evil. Who was the ultimate seed of the woman? This character is in the center stage of this battle. He is the Messiah, Jesus. This feeling of questioning and pondering of the irregularity of this command was for the Israelites a preparation for the contradiction of the cross, also a symbol of consternation and contradiction. This is a preparation for a lifted up symbol and it was directly intended to bring your mind here to the Genesis story. This passage of Genesis was exactly what God wanted to show His people. The battle of sin between good fruit and bad fruit. Whose children we would be. Turn to John 3:13-17. This is the conversation of Nicademus and Jesus at night. (You can refer to S1E4 a new creation) for more on this conversation.

And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life.

This also means that a man must be willing to take on this cosmic battle as well. He has to crucify himself for his family. He offers himself in the breach, just like Jesus. He must put his needs aside and take on the burden of service. I don’t mean burden in a begrudgingly sort of way, but joyfully. Is it hard? Yes. Suffering usually is. But the contradiction is carried over. In dying to himself, a man finds fulfillment. When he has someone to die for he finds completeness. Imagine, for a second, if Adam had stood up to the serpent. It would have completely changed the story. We find the weakness of man again as an apparent contradiction. O Happy Fault, as in the Easter Exultant (this is an ancient chant during the Easter Vigil about the Easter candle light which is the symbol of Christ’s light). Because by our failure, we were able to receive Jesus. In fact in failure as well as in success a man can and does bring salvation to his family in his struggle for holiness. He is the gift of God to his family and especially his wife (or the Church if he is single or a pastor). He is sent to fill cups. Turn to Philipians 2:6-11.The verses just before this talk about putting others’ interests before our own and I suggest you read them just to put this passage into context.

 Humility is the next trait. Not pridefulness. His ego must not get in the way of his serving and making an offering of himself to others. He must not become inflated with himself and be open to change or suggestions even if he thinks he has everything under control and knows what to do. Lot’s of things can help in his discernment of the next action to be taken. He should not be a pushover but he also needs to be open. He must Be a servant who empties himself humbly and obediently. What is the reward of that?

Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Leadership. Lordship. Love. The three L’s. What does that look like? Perhaps a good way to understand this is to put it into a spectrum. One end of the spectrum is absolute authority and rigid direction and on the other end is leniency, flexibility, and mercy. This is where most of us find our woundings. When the scale is tipped too far in either direction at the wrong moments in the carrying out of this calling. In my dad, I had a very good model of being a servant who emptied himself. He took center stage in the Cosmic Battle, daily and prayerfully. Like other fathers, he also failed in the spectrum. By this failing, my understanding of the Heavenly Father was skewed and it has taken quite some time to sort through these moments and have the Heavenly Father undo my perception into what He wants. This is still a work in progress where I am still learning something new and beautiful and sometimes even something difficult and ugly every day. But we have to be willing to go there. Otherwise no progress is made in our life.

So what are the three L’s supposed to look like? It is different for every situation. Sometimes leniency is needed and sometimes rigidness is needed. This is going to look different for every person. Some people are naturally soft and merciful and they need to grow in firmness and some people are too rigid and need to grow in gentleness. This can even swing generationally because of the child’s experience of his/her father. Remember what I said about children also needing different things? We have to be willing to fit the mold for each one.  The secret is listening. Being obedient to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Remember the prayer and obedience piece? This is going to look different for each sex but it does not take away the necessity of doing this for both parties. God is more direct with men and physically challenging because men can take it. In fact they need it to sharpen them and to grow. Men are more physical in nature because physically they need the activity to awaken. Whereas women have more feeling and thinking and need stillness just sitting. Again, this is not a competition or saying one is better than the other they are just different. They complement and help each other to grow in the spectrum of activity and stillness. Because this is an area both can learn more in and implement.
We will delve more into these themes as we go on, but for now let this be an introduction. We will take a look at more instances to better illustrate this point. If Something touched you, please share it with a friend. I would also like to be a part of your journey. Tell me if something resonated with you so I can keep giving you content that will help us both grow. Fill out a survey on my website, www.twoheartstruehealing.com or leave us a comment. You can also e-mail me at twoheartstruehealing@outlook.com for a more personal note. Thanks for listening and know that I am covering you in prayer. Until next time, God be with you and bless you and let His face shine upon you and give you peace.

Ps 78 is to close your prayer time.


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